Season’s Weather and Other Plagues

“If April flowers bring May showe– no, wait. If– if April… no, if May–”

“If April showers bring May flowers,” my sister prompted.

“Shut up,” I said. “I’m telling the joke.” We were driving home from my sister’s concert. During intermission, my dad had told me the most terrific joke, and I was excited to try it out.

‘If April flowers bring May showers, what to mayflowers bring?’ 

I had shrugged my shoulders, angling my knees to let a boy out of the aisle. Dad smirked.


“So,” I said again. “If April showers bring May flowers, what do mayflowers bring?”

My sister thought for a moment, as yellow lamplight sliding past our car lit sparkles into her earrings. Finally, she decisively stated:


From the front seat, my mom snorted. My dad was shaking with laughter.

“Pestilence?!” I grinned, outraged. “It’s Pilgrims! The Mayflower brought Pilgrims!”

“Pestilence is more historically accurate,” my sister sniffed. Dad guffawed.

Our car went rolling down 1300th, us laughing about pestilence that plagued Pilgrims the whole way home.



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